TIME

It's about time.

(or) Its about time.

Either one could be correct for this weekend.

Unless you live in Arizona or Hawaii.

Adios, pardners.

(or saying another way . . . )

Aloha!

SCANDINAVIAN TORTILLAS!

First of all, I have to apologize to all the Scandinavians who might read this blog.

What I'm going to write about are not "Scandinavian Tortillas" at all.

It's much better than that and should not have been blackened with my jokey phrase.

What I'm expounding about a bit here is the amazing, wonderful, delicious Norwegian flatbread known as lefse, or lefsa.

Coming from a family with a strong Norwegian background, I grew up with my grandmother's homemade lefse.

It's made with (often) leftover mashed potatoes, milk or cream, and  butter.

Wikipedia tells me it's made with "riced" potatoes and may use lard in place of the milk or cream.

It's a long and laborious process involving special rolling pins with grooves, a broad skillet (or lefsa pan) and lots of time.

Some cooks say they should be rolled out thin enough to see through.

And speaking of cooks, the genes were passed down in my family.

A nephew in North Dakota has sponsored an annual Lefsepalooza on the day after Thanksgiving where members of his far flung family, friends and neighbors come together in his spacious garage to turn out dozens of lefses.

A friend of years ago in South Dakota does it all himself but still produces lots of lefse.

A cousin of mine in Montana may also make lefse every year when the weather turns brisk and the holidays approach.

And year after year, I have entreated all of these people to please, please, please send me some of their product.

Have they listened?

Have they laughed at me?

Yes, probably both.

But have they ever answered my prayers?

Never.

NEVER!

Lo, all these many years, I have been lefse lost.

But then.

But THEN.

BUT THEN!

I spoke of my many years long search to another cousin.

She has participated in the Lefsepalooza.

She seemed surprised.

But sympathetic.

And today in the mail I received a package from her with THIRTY PIECES OF LEFSE inside!

To anyone without Scandinavian blood, you can't know how I felt when with trembling hands I removed a piece, buttered it, sugared it, rolled it and ate it.

That's my preferred method of devouring it, though some have been known to use it as a plate for Swedish meatballs and gravy or, lord forgive me for mentioning this detestable dish, LUTEFISK!)

Then I called my darling cousin, Cherie, who has lived all of her life in Minot, North Dakota, where lefse is as common as, well, tortillas, and from my knees thanked her for her generous answer to my plight.

"So, how was it?" she asked.

I replied carefully but honestly.

"Wonderful, but not as good as Grandma's."

THE FRIDAY FUNNIES - HALLOWEEN EDITION

To all of you people who noticed the first fake skeletons and evil witch costumes in your local stores back in August, you may now celebrate.

It's finally here.

Halloween.

Skulls and bats and vampires and witches and werewolves and monsters and...and...and...

Uffda, as we used to say in North Dakota, I'm overcome.

So let's delay no longer.

Let the howling begin.

You may have noticed, if you didn't have your head in the grog, that this edition of the weekend hilarity was slightly longer.

I guess the spirit moved me.

Now enjoy your Halloween festivities and all the rest of your weekend (including the leftover Trick or Treat candy! Yay!) and you suckers on Daylight Savings Time, don't forget to turn your clock back an hour on Saturday night.

But always remember to keep laughing!

Here, kitty-kitty . . .

( . . . ooooohhh, look out . . . )

GETTING READY

In case you thought I'd forgotten, tomorrow is Halloween.

Decorations are going up everywhere and our home is no exception.

Yes, it's the one night of the year you can dream up your silliest costume and go door to door with "the littles" trying to grub the neighbors out of free candy.

Actually trick-or-treating seems to be going out of practice with towns like mine sponsoring one big gathering place where the kiddies can be brought for treats and games.

Anyway, if I was going out on the night prowl, I think I know what my theme costumery would be.

THE PROBLEMS OF AGING

This cartoon perfectly shows my current level of competence.

To wit, confusion piled atop confusion.

For several days, off and on, I've been trying to find a site on YouTube for a live streaming in a few days of a celebration of the life of a dear friend, who passed away awhile back.

I can bring up the site on my desktop computer.

I can bring up the site on my Android phone.

But for some reason I can't seem to bring it up on my television in the living room.

Even though the teevee is now synched to my camera phone.

 ====but wait, he had another idea====

One hour later, I think I've solved it.  The tv is now saying it's linked to my phone and it will play whatever I pick there.

Since the celebration isn't going to be live until Saturday, I guess it won't show up on the t.v. until it begins.

I'm holding my ancient breath and crossing my arthritic fingers.

In other news, my good friend Jeanne sent this picture from Colorado.

It's her dog Tillie and Jeanne says she has to use the leaf blower on her before she can come in the house, now that it's fall.

Jeanne and Timmer, her husband and my long-time-ago colleague in the Phoenix t.v. biz, have always had, shall we say, l-a-r-g-e dogs.

Jeanne says this one is a Landseer, which is a black-and-white Newfoundland, and it tips the scales at 95 pounds.

I sure hope it likes that leaf blower.

Oh, and by the way, I DID turn out a wonderful Chocolate Walnut Banana Bread this morning!

THE SMELL OF AUTUMN

I baked a loaf of Pumpkin Bread today.

Here's the loaf, still resting in it's parchment paper lined pan.

Warning: that white stuff that may look like mold to you is actually a topping of cinnamon sugar.

It was a long time till it became cool enough to lift out of the pan and slice but the smell of that pumpkin baking was enough to make me think of joining those of you who think Halloween should be a National Holiday.

Later . . . too much later for me but I do (sometimes) take instructions from the publishers of recipes . . . I got my faithful wife to do the initial carving.

It was pumpkin beauty.

And it tasted and smelled even better than it looked in the first photo.

The taste and smell of Autumn.

(Do I rhapsodize too much?)

THE FRIDAY FUNNIES

Lords and Ladies of Darkness, I hereby serve notice that today is one week from Halloween.

Some have already begun their decorating (see Wednesday's post) but others, including yours truly, have only just begun.

So let's take a look at my first efforts and other attempts to lighten your moods.

And that's all, witches and warlocks.

I promise, Halloween will be a day to remember . . . or forget?

At any rate, brace yourselves (as the retired dentist always says) and in the meantime, have a sugar-filled, deliciously ribald weekend.

And always remember to keep laughing!

Here, kitty-kitty . . .

( . . . I knew it, I KNEW IT . . . )